The Art of the Flow

Go with the flow. People say that to me a lot. Go with the flow, Rose. Go with the flow. Look, I know that at times I can be rigid, routined or scheduled. (C'mon, NO ONE thinks that's a little sexy?) However, I pride myself on balancing it out with having a bit of a wild side (I do run with scissors when the time is right...). But often times when people say 'go with the flow', what they really mean is go with THEIR flow. People don't say it when they think you are being agreeable or manageable. ("Hey, you seem pretty happy Rose, go with the flow already...") No, they say it when they think you are being disagreeable or unmanageable.

Go with the flow. Go with the flow. Humpf. I know most people say it when they want you to readily accept change as it is happening. I believe it would be different if their intentions were supportive in nature; if they really are saying "go with your OWN flow". But I certainly don't think that's what they mean. Ironically I think it actually sets up limitations. Because it doesn't leave you much wiggle room, now does it? Either you go with the flow or what? Prison? Honestly? I think it's a subliminal way to control someone.

And to tell you the truth? It's worst when you say it to yourself. When you tell yourself to 'go with the flow', you are probably doing it because someone wants you to do something you don't want to do. So, you beat yourself up thinking that if you were easy going and whatnot, you would simply be going with that damn flow already. But here's the thing. If going with your OWN flow means going against what you (or your mother or your husband) THINK you SHOULD be doing, it might be worth investigating. Sometimes we DO know what's best for ourselves. Without all of the 'shoulds' and flows.

During all of my thinking last week about going with the flow. I read something that truly made me laugh out loud.

"If you go with the flow you'll eventually end up over the waterfall." -

Adam R. Gwizdala

I am proud that MY own flow is a mixture of structure and spontaneity. I like routines, but these days, I will shelf my routined plans for the girls and I when I recognize that we need to be doing something else. (Once we skipped a Daisy meeting and piano lessons because we all of us needed to veg. Wahoo. I do live life in the fast lane, don't I?) Look, my flow may not be wild, 'let's fly to Boston for dinner' flow, but it's my flow. And I don't see myself going over any waterfalls any time soon.